Changing My Mind.....

So as I said in my previous post, I was going to sign up for weight watchers...  Well, that didn't exactly pan out.  Justin and I have been pretty tight lately as we are trying to really get out of debt.  I wasn't able to sign up last week, due to this fact.  Monday I received an email from my mom, asking me what I thought about Jenny Craig? Now, I have tried it for like 2 weeks back in 2007, before I got married.  It didn't work for me and my lifestyle...Busy school, work, crazy life with a boyfriend at the time (who's now le husband).  I seriously thought about it, and I said yes! She has offered to help with the costs, and is being super supportive.  So is the husband.  Today is my first day, and so far, so good.  The food is really yummy and i have to incorporate alot of fresh foods along with it! So far I don't feel hungry! yay!

The reason I decided to go with Jenny is, because I have a hard time sticking to anything! It's a terrible green monster in my closet.  It's just how I work.  I'm not proud of it nor does it help me in any way possible.  It's a huge down fall of mine.  Jenny is not cheap, and for my mom to be dishing out that kind of money, kinda makes me responsible for all of it.  The quicker I loose my first 20 lbs (which is what we signed up for), the better.  I definitely don't have a weight on my shoulders about it, but a fresh, invigorating view of loosing this weight with eating good! I feel really good about it.

Confession part 1:  I had a slight panic attack last night about the cost of this.  I was scared already before I even started that the cost was going to be too much and it wouldn't last.  I feel like if this works, what am I going to do if I can't continue.  NOTHING has worked in the past.  I just haven't been able to get my head around it.

Confession part 2:  I have 80 pounds to loose to be at the top of my healthy BMI index number.  Holy freaking cow!!!!!   WHAT! 80 pounds...excuse me...is this thing on! HELLO! Can't it be more like just 20???? NOT!  This scares the crap out of me.

Today I feel confident that this is going to be my lifestyle change for the good.  I am going to learn what I should be eating, how I should be eating for the long haul.  Some serious changes. I know I pretty much sound like a broken record.  I'm sorry for that.. Like I previously said sticking to something is my down fall.  It SUCKS!

Thank you all for encouraging me always, even when you get sick and tired of routing me on when I have yet again failed.  It helps me stay somewhat sane through trying to get through this.

I'll keep updating as I go and how I am feeling......until then,


Loves