Thursday, November 10, 2011

Long time, No Blog....

I have missed you all.  It's definitely been a while since I last posted anything,  mostly to the fact that all that has been going on is health issues.  I have been dealing with migraines lately, and let me tell you, they are not fun! at all! The doc has been trying to figure out med's for me.  I also see a neurologist next week. I am hoping that we will find some answers there.  These days I have been feeling pretty blah, and it's really showing.  I cannot get motivated to go to the gym, I don't have much energy to do anything.
In the midst of it all I am trying to be really optomistic and see what God is doing through me and in me.  I'm trying to see what is going to positively come out of this? Is it to make me stronger, to meet someone to share Him with that person, or what?! Is it to make Justin and I stronger and to help make our relationship stronger, I just don't know.  All I do know is I have amazing people by my side and Justin has been amazing through it all.
I know I need to get healthy.  I am at my worst right now.  Healthy wise, weight wise too, but my focus is more on my health at the moment.  I need to get rid of the headaches or find the root cause.  I need to learn how to manage them appropriately.  I feel that my sinusitis is somewhat under control.  I think since I was on the steroid, it has been better.  I just need to continually take really good care of that.  I need to start putting myself first.  I know that when I have other things to focus on, I focus on that and not me.  Well I need to stop being lazy when it comes to my health.  I am lazy, and I hate it! I'm done with it.  I just have to do it, and it's not going to get any easier.

I love watching the biggest looser, because I see these people and I can relate to what they feel, and how hard it is for them.  I know their struggles with food, and being tired because you are over weight.  I get it! I'm there.  I'm heavier than some of those girls on there! SO i know if they can, I can.  It's just a matter of staying motivated, and making lifestyle changes.   This is what I want.  That is the life I always wanted: healthy, active, peaceful.  Right now I am the exact opposite! So baby steps to where I need to be with getting there.