Thursday, March 31, 2011
Jobs, Hopes and Dreams......
So as of yesterday Justin was given a raise at his review! He received a 2.5% raise, and he is expected to get a 4% raise in July! We are beyond blessed. This will happen every year as long as he is at City of Hope. It truly is a City of Hope, not only for the patients who get admitted there, but for the employees of that wonderful place. We have been overwhelmed by God's grace and support for us by giving Justin this amazing job. He is often very tired, but he thrives off of it. He loves every second he is at work! They also just launched the new blood mobile for City of Hope! It's AWESOME! I took a tour through it after the dedication/ribbon cutting ceremony that was held this past monday. I can't believe the generosity of the donor, for giving such a beautiful contribution to this awesome cause! Just remember...BLOOD=LIFE! As for me, Monday April 4th will be my last day working at Starbucks. I have gained more hours at the architectural job that I have. I'm not completely at 40 hours, but this will give me more time to focus on doing hair on the side. I was really missing doing it, so this will be exciting for me. I am doing a wedding in May, consisting of the Bride, and 4 or 5 bridesmaids. I'm really excited! I'm also doing Amy's (my sister in law) mom's hair for Ruthie (Amy's sister) wedding. So that will be fun! I feel so excited to look back at the last 6 months and see where God has directed me. I feel like I am right where I am supposed to be. No, I don't make as much as I would like to, or have the full 40 hours I would like to, but I am HAPPY! I'm already starting to feel more balanced, and will continue to strive to be balanced. We are still working on getting out of debt, but it's hard. We don't have much more coming in, and with getting hit pretty hard by the IRS on owing them $2000.00, we have been set back quite a bit. Which in turn means it is going to take even longer to have a child. We want to be completely out of credit card debt when we have our first kid. All the credit cards that are in our Debt Program we had to cancel, so it makes no sense not to get rid of those before we have a child. We have CONTROL over that much, the rest is fine. We just really want to be financially okay before we bring a child into this world. So I guess that's it for now.. Sorry it has been a while since I have updated. I miss all of you terribly, and I know I don't get to see your faces as often as we would like to. Hopefully this will keep up updated as to what is going on in our lives! Love you all, Blessings, Amber
Friday, March 11, 2011
Tragedy, God, and Loss....
For the past couple weeks I have been reading and keeping updated on a family back in Indiana. Here is a link to her blog http://lisahusmann.wordpress.com/. I don't particularly know these people, but their story has deeply touched me and I have faithfully been praying for them. As of last night Jaxton passed away at only 2 weeks of life. He was a miracle baby to live that long. They are truly a remarkable family of God and their strength and love for God just astounds me.
Hearing the news of the horrific tsunami that hit Japan, just tore me apart today as I was sitting at my desk this morning watching devastating videos of the tragedy. I have this deep gut feeling that we, living in California are next. Not to say that I know exactly when that will happen or if it even will, but I worry.
I know that my faith has staggered off and on, which is funny how if you think about it.. God doesn't love us one day and then phase out of my life for a few weeks or months....No....He is always there....So why do i have such a hard time being focused on Him all the time. I don't leave Justin for any given time, he is my husband. I hate that something tragic makes me draw closer to HIM, when it should be all the time. I hear....."the end times are near, get your heart right with God." That is so a cop out. It should always be right with God. He is your father, your healer, your protector, your grace, and your Love of all time.
I have been really bitter lately in regards to God and I think life in general. With so much going on, I know I need to draw near to Him, but I don't, I push away. I have always done so. I hate that I do this. There is so much hate and fear and horrible things going on in the world, that why would you want to feel more alone than ever, when you can feel safe and loved by the One who controls everything in this world! His love is never ending, never failing, always true. i know these words, I hear them, I say them. But I just can't get it! I love God with all of my being, why can't I nurture our relationship?
I feel guilty for the way I act and feel. God deserves more from me.....He deserves all of me. not just when I feel like it. I want to give ALL of me to Him! I guess it just comes down to priorities. I know this has turned into an Amber blog, not a Gerhart family update blog, and for that I'm sorry. Most of what I blog about, effects Justin as well. Our spiritual life, not just mine. Our finances, not just mine. I'm feeling so much sadness for so many at this time, I can't help to call on the One who can heal and save.
On a lighter note, we are going out tonight with our friends Jenn and Craig. Craig is sending us girls out to dinner! What a guy! It will be good to catch up and have GIRL TIME!
Hope you all have a great day!
Loves!
Hearing the news of the horrific tsunami that hit Japan, just tore me apart today as I was sitting at my desk this morning watching devastating videos of the tragedy. I have this deep gut feeling that we, living in California are next. Not to say that I know exactly when that will happen or if it even will, but I worry.
I know that my faith has staggered off and on, which is funny how if you think about it.. God doesn't love us one day and then phase out of my life for a few weeks or months....No....He is always there....So why do i have such a hard time being focused on Him all the time. I don't leave Justin for any given time, he is my husband. I hate that something tragic makes me draw closer to HIM, when it should be all the time. I hear....."the end times are near, get your heart right with God." That is so a cop out. It should always be right with God. He is your father, your healer, your protector, your grace, and your Love of all time.
I have been really bitter lately in regards to God and I think life in general. With so much going on, I know I need to draw near to Him, but I don't, I push away. I have always done so. I hate that I do this. There is so much hate and fear and horrible things going on in the world, that why would you want to feel more alone than ever, when you can feel safe and loved by the One who controls everything in this world! His love is never ending, never failing, always true. i know these words, I hear them, I say them. But I just can't get it! I love God with all of my being, why can't I nurture our relationship?
I feel guilty for the way I act and feel. God deserves more from me.....He deserves all of me. not just when I feel like it. I want to give ALL of me to Him! I guess it just comes down to priorities. I know this has turned into an Amber blog, not a Gerhart family update blog, and for that I'm sorry. Most of what I blog about, effects Justin as well. Our spiritual life, not just mine. Our finances, not just mine. I'm feeling so much sadness for so many at this time, I can't help to call on the One who can heal and save.
On a lighter note, we are going out tonight with our friends Jenn and Craig. Craig is sending us girls out to dinner! What a guy! It will be good to catch up and have GIRL TIME!
Hope you all have a great day!
Loves!
Monday, March 7, 2011
Confused/Lost/and Thankful
Hey Guys!
I know it's been a while since I've blogged....So here goes.......
Life as of now, is so totally unbalanced it's not funny. Both for Justin and I. Church, work, spiritual life, fun, family, friends, none of them exist except for work. How could this be? How can we get so carried away by work and unhealthy habits, that we are just spiraliing down into a really bad situation. Earlier this month, last month, we got slammed with some pretty hard news from the IRS, that is going to be a major set back for us, like a year long set back. We are just frustrated moreso with it, than anything.
We still haven't decided on a church yet, that we both like. So we are still on the hunt for that. I think it is taking it's toll, between working some Sundays and not being able to go, and then just being more resentful that we can't attend, and we are so tired. Working on our marriage is just not happening, and spending quality time in front of the tv does not count as quality time. Which in turns means we are so exhausted we don't want to do anything but sit. We don't go to the gym, we don't read the Bible or spend time doing a devotion. These are all things that we long for in our life, but jsut can't get the fire to do so. WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE!!!!!!!
So, now that I have ranted and raved. How can we fix or enrich our lives? One I need to get a full time job. I'm not sure what the looks like right now, but it needs to happen. I can't have this eratically crazy job schedule anymore. I love my achitectural job, but I need 40 hours, and I can't have that. So now everything is on me and it's a sucky place to be in. Let me tell you. It's so hard, Justin has found his nitch, and loves love loves what he does. I'm so thankful for that. But i feel just left in the dust and it's totally my own fault. i can't believe that I have done this to myself.
POSTIVES:
I know it's been a while since I've blogged....So here goes.......
Life as of now, is so totally unbalanced it's not funny. Both for Justin and I. Church, work, spiritual life, fun, family, friends, none of them exist except for work. How could this be? How can we get so carried away by work and unhealthy habits, that we are just spiraliing down into a really bad situation. Earlier this month, last month, we got slammed with some pretty hard news from the IRS, that is going to be a major set back for us, like a year long set back. We are just frustrated moreso with it, than anything.
We still haven't decided on a church yet, that we both like. So we are still on the hunt for that. I think it is taking it's toll, between working some Sundays and not being able to go, and then just being more resentful that we can't attend, and we are so tired. Working on our marriage is just not happening, and spending quality time in front of the tv does not count as quality time. Which in turns means we are so exhausted we don't want to do anything but sit. We don't go to the gym, we don't read the Bible or spend time doing a devotion. These are all things that we long for in our life, but jsut can't get the fire to do so. WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE!!!!!!!
So, now that I have ranted and raved. How can we fix or enrich our lives? One I need to get a full time job. I'm not sure what the looks like right now, but it needs to happen. I can't have this eratically crazy job schedule anymore. I love my achitectural job, but I need 40 hours, and I can't have that. So now everything is on me and it's a sucky place to be in. Let me tell you. It's so hard, Justin has found his nitch, and loves love loves what he does. I'm so thankful for that. But i feel just left in the dust and it's totally my own fault. i can't believe that I have done this to myself.
POSTIVES:
- AMAZING Apartment to live in for really cheap!
- Justin has an AMAZING JOB!
- We both own cars that are reliable!
- We both have AMAZING family who support us!
- WE LOVE EACH OTHER!
- God is on our side and is routing in our corner for us to be GREAT!
- I HAVE a JOB! (2 to be exact).
SOOOO...
We have a lot of amazing things going for us. We just need to realize that life IS NOT perfect, and it IS hard. So we need to just suck it up and go!
THanks for listening/reading whats going on. We just ask for prayer as we are trying to figure life out. We love you and are praying for you all as well!
Ambs
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