Drum roll please.......

So, No Dice.

Aunt Flo came to town with a very unwelcome visit yesterday.

I've been doing a lot of praying since yesterday.  Asking for comfort and peace and strength.

I had to call my Dr. as soon as I started my new cycle, and here we go.  I have an appt tomorrow at 4:30p.m. to start all over.

Here we go again!  As much as I hate the process and feel drained and exhausted after 1 month, I feel so thankful for the process.  I am thankful that we have an option besides hearing No.  I'm thankful that we are in the age of knowledge we are in, because 50 years ago, this process would not have happened.  We would just be told, I'm sorry, you are infertile.

While I still believe a miracle can happen without the drugs, ultrasounds, and shots, why not use what we can while we have it.  IVF is not an option for us.  We simply can't afford it.   We cannot take on IVF as well as Justin's schooling.  We just don't have that kind of money.  Right now, Justin's schooling is outweighing anything, because if we don't have that, then we don't have progression in our life.

Who knew being an adult would be so heart wrenching and stressful.  They definitely don't teach you that in school among the math and history and writing classes.

I'm thankful for where we are.  It may not be ideal and I get weighed down by it most often times, but I'm thankful for where we are.  It won't always be like this.  I remember I have asked God to give me patience.  Well, here is my lesson in just that.  Patience in waiting on God, patience in waiting for our lives to start with a little one.  It is a hard lesson, probably the hardest I've had to learn yet in my 29 years on this earth.  But I'm learning them with the best person I know by my side.  I'm so thankful for that man, God gifted me with doing life with.  He's my heart and my soul.  He's my anchor.